by admin | Jan 23, 2026 | EMDR, Mental Health, Positive, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Trauma
We’re deeply honoured that S has chosen to share part of her healing journey and what EMDR has meant for her, even 70 years after a profoundly painful event in her life. It’s an incredible act of trust—and a privilege we don’t take lightly. Thank you, S!
In the Spring of 2022, I was diagnosed in a pain clinic with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and the clinic’s Psychologist encouraged me that EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) would be worth pursuing.
I contacted Alongside You, and soon was paired with Kathryn Priest-Peries, a Registered Clinical Counsellor and Registered Social Worker who offered EMDR sessions.
Talk therapy was helpful in my past to deal with my mental health issues and abusive relationships, but having a skilled, experienced therapist use this light therapy (and talk therapy as well) was life-changing for me. Over time, it has explained so much of my life’s journey to me.
My first two appointments with this experienced, caring therapist at Alongside You were about reliving my life’s journey, in which she assessed me.
As a little 4-year-old girl, along with my 7-year-old sister, I was present at the scene where our 9-year-old brother had a tragic accident, which took his life. He was the oldest child in our family. Back then, as an adult, every time I talked about my brother, I cried, and after my EMDR sessions, I understood why. It was indeed PTSD. The memory of seeing him writhing in pain was just as vivid 70 years later.
The painful, hard work began weekly. I expected and was mentally prepared to accept it, but I learned far more than I could have imagined. New feelings I hadn’t been aware of were exposed. They were terrified and alone, and the tears came in abundance. Our family life had changed completely, and as a child, I thought I must have been at fault for something; for one thing, my mother was no longer affectionate. Since my father drove the farm machinery that caused the accident, I carried the guilt I thought he must have felt, or I thought he did. After all, I saw him carrying my brother in his arms and taking him to the hospital.
Fortunately, I escaped the substance abuse addiction of so many with a trauma history, but I had a different addiction. All my life, I tried to figure out how to make myself feel better when I felt others were hurting or sick. Thus, I may have learned to be compassionate and kind, but at times it was unwanted, and it also caused me to feel pain I didn’t need to carry. I suffered from anxiety disorder and depression off and on.
After working through the weeks of EMDR, it was clear to me what I had done, and all of a sudden, I felt much freer. Others noticed, including my daughter, how much I had changed in a short time.
I understand that EMDR is considered a very effective treatment for PTSD, and I agree. What I can say is that it possibly works well if you are willing to deal with mental pain and ready to work through it.
After a month of therapy, I told Kathryn the vision I now had of my brother was him lying at rest alongside my parents and grandparents, and I knew he was safe and not in pain. The scene of the cemetery I had of a dusty, windy place wasn’t the same. My visit to that place a few years before this therapy was to a green, serene, beautiful place, which is what I now see. He is lying safe and pain-free beside his family. My new memory of his last time with us changed thanks to the work of the EMDR sessions, and I do not cry every time I speak of Freddie*. Kathryn told me the therapy was working and doing what it is meant to do.
On occasion, I slip back to old habits. Now, I know that although my old thoughts are still there, my response can be and is different. I am grateful to access appointments with Kathryn because of the Step Forward Program. I still struggle, and the little girl surfaces, but help is available for my situation and is also affordable. EMDR has been a life-changing, invaluable experience, and I am forever grateful. In fact, we still use it in some sessions today.
– S
*Names have been modified to uphold the client’s privacy, as well as their family’s.
If you would like help on your own journey of healing, please connect with us. We’re here to help and it really can feel better, even decades later.
by Marcia Moitoso | Nov 7, 2025 | Mental Health, Mental Health Disorder, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, PTSD, Safety, Trauma
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a powerful, empirically supported psychotherapy developed to treat post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and a range of related conditions. At its core, EMDR helps people access and reprocess distressing experiences that continue to shape their current emotions, beliefs, and behaviors. By engaging the brain’s natural healing mechanisms, EMDR allows individuals to move toward genuine resolution and relief.
What is EMDR and How Does it Work?
If you’re new to EMDR or would like a refresher, I recommend starting with Kathryn Priest-Peries’s excellent overview, What on Earth Is EMDR?, which explains the process in detail from a client-centered perspective. You can also take a look at this video from the EMDR International Association which walks through each step of EMDR treatment.
In its standard form, EMDR follows a well-defined, eight-phase protocol. This structured approach produces reliable results for many people who have experienced trauma or ongoing distress. However, when someone presents with Complex PTSD (C-PTSD), Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), or significant dissociation, EMDR therapists with advanced training make important modifications. These adjustments are designed to ensure safety, stabilize the nervous system, and support the client’s readiness to process painful memories effectively.
At its foundation, EMDR rests on the understanding that the human brain is inherently equipped to heal from painful experiences, much like the body naturally heals from physical wounds. When a traumatic event overwhelms our capacity to cope, the brain’s natural healing process can become “stuck,” leaving distressing memories unprocessed. EMDR uses a combination of focused attention, guided dialogue, and bilateral stimulation (such as eye movements, tapping, or sounds) to help the brain resume that innate healing process.
This process is guided by the Adaptive Information Processing (AIP) model. In simple terms, the AIP model suggests that healing occurs when the brain can connect painful or overwhelming memories with other, healthier information already stored in its memory networks. When these connections form, the emotional intensity and distorted beliefs attached to the traumatic memory begin to resolve, allowing the person to experience the past as truly in the past.
A Simple Example
Imagine someone who experiences a hit-and-run accident. Afterwards, they develop flashbacks and a constant sense of danger while driving. Suppose this person grew up in a safe, supportive environment where emotions were expressed and validated. They come to EMDR therapy to address their anxiety and flashbacks.
During treatment, the EMDR process helps their brain link the traumatic event with earlier experiences of safety, trust, and competence. As the nervous system reorients toward those adaptive experiences, the distress naturally diminishes and the person creates new meaning around the experience. The person begins to feel calm, grounded, and confident behind the wheel again—often after only a few sessions.
This is how standard EMDR is designed to work—and for many people, it works beautifully.
But what happens when someone did not grow up in a safe or nurturing environment, or when their life has involved years of chronic trauma or neglect? That’s where EMDR for Complex PTSD, dissociative disorders, and survivors of early trauma becomes more nuanced.
EMDR for Complex PTSD, Dissociative Disorders, and Survivors of Early Neglect or Trauma
When someone has endured years of chronic trauma, neglect, or instability (especially during childhood), EMDR often needs to look different from the standard approach described above. There are two main reasons for this:
- Limited access to adaptive information
As mentioned earlier, standard EMDR relies on the brain’s ability to connect a painful memory with more adaptive, healthy experiences. For example, the nervous system might recall the sense of safety or comfort that existed before the traumatic event, allowing the brain to “update” the old memory with new meaning: I survived; I’m safe now.
However, for many people who grew up in unsafe or unpredictable environments, there were few experiences of consistent emotional or physical safety. Instead of learning people are generally good and I am worthy of care, the brain internalizes the opposite messages: people are dangerous, and I am bad or unworthy. Without those adaptive reference points, the standard EMDR process has little healthy material to connect to.
- Overwhelm and dissociation
Even if someone has experienced moments of safety, years of chronic stress or trauma can make it extremely difficult to access that information. When the nervous system has been in survival mode for long periods, the brain may rely on an extreme form of coping called structural dissociation – essentially, deep compartmentalization of experience.
In this state, the brain “walls off” traumatic memories or emotions in order to function day to day. This strategy allows for survival but often leads to distressing symptoms later on: flashbacks, emotional numbness, gaps in memory, or sudden shifts in mood or behaviour. Because the traumatic memories remain unprocessed, they continue to intrude – sometimes as nightmares, body sensations, or painful beliefs about the self.
In some cases, the mind may even organize into distinct “parts” or self-states, each holding different emotions, memories, or survival strategies. Someone might notice that one part of them feels calm and capable, while another part feels terrified, angry, or shut down. These experiences are not “imagined”—they reflect the brain’s adaptive effort to manage what once felt unbearable.
For this reason, basic EMDR, which begins directly with traumatic memories, can feel overwhelming or even destabilizing.
How EMDR Is Adapted for Complex Trauma
Unlike standard EMDR, we don’t start with the memories. It is often too overwhelming for a person who has sustained prolonged trauma to start by going straight for memories. Instead we work through the trauma in a series of layers
Layer 1: Installing adaptive information
Before processing trauma, we first establish internal and relational safety. Using bilateral stimulation and the supportive relationship with the therapist, we begin to “install” experiences of calm, safety, and self-compassion—sometimes in very small, manageable doses. This stage also includes learning about how trauma affects the brain and body, which helps clients make sense of their reactions and realize that what they’re experiencing is a normal response to overwhelming events.
Many people begin to notice subtle but meaningful shifts here, such as the emerging belief: I’m not bad, and not all people are unsafe. I went through terrible experiences that shaped those beliefs, but they are not the whole truth of who I am.
Layer 2: Addressing fears about healing
For those who have lived with trauma for a long time, even the idea of healing can feel scary. There may be fears about feeling emotions, remembering painful events, or losing control. Using EMDR techniques, we work through these fears in the present moment, gently calming the nervous system so it can tolerate greater safety and emotional processing.
Layer 3: Working with parts of self
Because complex trauma often leads to internal fragmentation, EMDR therapists may integrate elements of parts work, such as concepts from Internal Family Systems (IFS). This helps clients recognize and build communication between their different self-states. As compassion and understanding grow within the internal system, the mind begins to feel less divided and more cohesive.
Layer 4: Processing traumatic memories
Only when there is sufficient stability and internal cooperation do we begin to process traumatic memories directly—and even then, this looks gentler than standard EMDR. The therapist offers ongoing guidance, helping ensure that the client remains grounded and resourced throughout. Over time, the once-fragmented memories integrate into a coherent story that no longer overwhelms the nervous system and is experienced as truly in the past. People notice many of their symptoms resolve and they begin to feel more whole.
A Final Note
This process can sound complex—and it is—but for those who have lived through years of trauma, it’s a thoughtful, compassionate, and profoundly hopeful path toward healing. EMDR therapists with advanced training in complex trauma and dissociation understand this work deeply and serve as steady guides throughout the process.
I’ve had the privilege of witnessing many clients heal from experiences that once felt impossible to face. If you have questions about whether EMDR might be appropriate for you or someone you care about, please reach out. We’re always happy to explain how this approach can be safely and effectively tailored to your unique needs. We’re here for you.
If you’re an EMDR clinician looking to hone your skills in working with clients who present with C-PTSD, we also offer EMDR consultation. Please reach out to us for more details.
